Gary Schwartz's Facebook profile


mbta simulator...

apparently the MBTA has some fancy new hey-hey-look-at-me-i'm-driving-a-bus simulator.

yeah that's nice, but what i want to know is can it simulate all of my favorite scenes from the 'this could only happen on public transportation' series?

can it simulate the distractingly unsanitary click-click of someone cutting their nails on the t?


how about the man who threw up into his own pants? is there a button for that one?


i'm going to mail her a check for $91.58 and then claim it on my next tax refund as a charitable donation

read all about it here

i do (?)

there was a tiny little article on boston.com this morning about our neighbors to the north (new hampshire) voting on gay marriage today.

while california may have put gay marriage on a string and then yanked it back, at least it's still alive and well in two states, MA and CT. i was excited when i saw earlier this week that vermont was wrestling with upping their trailblazing civil union legislation a big pink notch to full marriage. and then today's news snippit re: NH... how great would it be if new england (and possibly *all* of it) managed to show the rest of the country how to be forward-thinking? (we won't wait on rhode island, since everyone knows it's just connecticuts's unsightly spare appendage, no one likes to aknowledge it exists... but i've seen it).

well, i was feeling all content until i got to this line of the article-ette, which then pissed me off:

'Opponents argue same-sex marriage is morally wrong and would cheapen marriage.'

i couldn't care less about the morality stuff. that arguement really is looking a little lame these days and just sounds like a lot of born-again-noise from someone with a stripped down chevy 'flowerbox' up on blocks in their front yard.

but same-sex marriage would cheapen marriage? cheapen it? oh you know, you're right. we would't want to tarnish all those most sacred of breeder matrimonial customs- drive through vow exchanges in vegas, garter tosses (because that's sanitary), plastic fountains gurgling pink champagne, mashing cake into the face of your partner (ok, i like that part), and the ever klassy reception line dancing. so much to cherish. so much on the line. i can see why they've got their republican-issued falwell-blessed knickers in a queerbunch.



not a shockah...

i must confess, surprised i wasn't when i reached for the soy milk this morning and noticed the US economy is featured as this month's carton-side missing person:


i would put a call in to crimestoppers with a tip on a recent sighting (US economy, last seen drinking mouthwash and clipping coupons at the JFK t station), but all i had left for the AIG bonus fund were my rollover minutes, now rendering me incommunicado.

it does all kinda makes sense: last week i had to issue an amber alert for the other half of my 401k. maybe if we leave a little plate of TARP by the front door she'll find her way back home...

seriously, what a mess. i love how the republicans continue their praisethelordgaysarebad spendnotchickensquawk when it was all their 'let's-fight-two-wars-with-no-money-down-no-payments-for-a-year' economic strip-mining that landed us in this financialshitstorm. everything else? healthcare? education? haphazard lending? let's just pretend this is a 1984 caldor's and put it all on layaway.

while it is terrifying for a million different reasons, there is one potential good thing that can come out of all of this. i wholeheartedly believe this country needed a reality check on the topic of unconscious consumption. and perhaps given the dramatic turn of events (namely the fact the economy is running around with no pants on) people will actually examine their daily lives and start paying attention to some of the unsustainable wastefulness that has led to double-wide SUV's full of diabetic americans on their way to a bigboxstripmall for another 25lb bag of frozen mozzarella cheese sticks. not that i have anything against fried cheese. i believe 'moderation' is the word i'm looking for.

while j.mo and i already live pretty responsibly, the current climate got us thinking there was more we could do- we swapped our expensive cable tv and internet for slower & cheaper options, cutting our monthly bill in half. not exactly a big sacrifice, but still financially helpful in leaner times.

larger in scale and savings, we're also selling our car. paying almost $600 a month for a car payment, insurance, and gas when more often than not, the only driving we do is to the grocery store just doesn't seem all that smaht anymore. we both love our car, especially j.mo-carboy. but i think there is a difference between loving the *idea* of having a car and actually needing one. we ride the T to work and usually take the T for non-work-related happenings too. once it's sold, we'll be zipcar-ing for the one or two trips a week that require wheels. otherwise it's all about the MBTA. better for the budget, better for the environment. it just makes sense. it will be an adjustment, but i think it will work just fine.

so i'm hoping that with this post i might get back to regular blogging. i miss it. and while facebook is fun, fast, and friend-ful, it's not nearly the same as a good ol' fashioned blog post. i've been neglectful of blogging duties and wonder if anyone even bothers to check for updates anymore?